I found this new blog that I just spent an hour looking through, yes that is the joys of the blogging world. I decided to take part in this event called “Show & Tell Monday” Every Monday this Momma has a theme and asks five questions. This one sparked my interested because I love “My story”. We often get carried away with the hustle and bustle of life and raising children that it’s really nice to sit and reflect on how that lovely family started. So here is a way for me to share my story with you and live through my “BM” days again. BM=Before Madison.
1. Are you married? If so when did you get married, and tell us about your special day. If not? How would you describe your dream wedding?
I am indeed married. Very married. Happily married. Andy and I were married on June 6, 2009. The perfect day, the perfect wedding for us. We were married at Vineyard in NH. Yes I love my wine, anyone who knows me, knows this! However it was more than that. It was beautiful, it was the first place we looked at, it was one of the best days of my life. 85 degrees with sun the shining. I’m a nervous person, I hate being the center of attention and I hate, hate hate, knowing everyone is looking at me, but despite those feelings I wanted my dream wedding, I wanted the princess dress, I wanted to vow my love in front of all of my family and friends. The only one thing missing from that magical day was my father. I knew when we lost him 9 years prior that he would not be their for my special day and that tore me apart everyday until that special day took place. My father granted me the one thing I asked for though, Strength. Strength to get through the day without him. The second my mother took my arm and walked me down the aisle, I had strength I never thought I would ever have. The sinking feeling of not having my father walk me towards my new husband disappeared because my mother was there to do just that. As I looked down the aisle and saw my best friend, my husband, the future father of my children, I no longer had the emptiness in my heart because my husband filled it with hope, love and happiness. And still does three years later.
2. Show us some wedding pictures. Either yours or of some that you love.
My Mom gave me away.
3. How about the engagement? Tell us your story. If not engaged, what’s your dream proposal?
I guess we all have our special story. Mine was special to me for a few reasons. One, because I had my family there to share the moment with and two because it happened to take place where we got married. Yes we had our place booked before we were “officially” engaged, we knew it was just a matter of saving money and getting the details down, I had no idea it was because Andy was having a ring made for me, he hinted quite a few times that he wanted to go to the beach, me not being much of a beach person suspected that’s where he wanted to do it, so I said, “Nah I’m all set with the beach.” aka. hint-hint you best think of another plan my friend! Well he did! He actually even pulled it off as a surprise as well. We were going to a wine tasting at the vineyard where we had put a deposit down. We asked my mother, his mother, my grandmother and my two cousins, who were both later on, bridesmaids to join us. When he asked me to go for a walk when we first got there, I said “No”. I was showing my family around, enjoying a nice glass of wine, I didn’t want to go for a walk! Well I had no idea still what he had planned on doing, finally I just went because he was nagging me so much, I was suspicious when we first walked outside, but he quickly made me doubt those suspicions by taking me through the vineyards and pointed to where he wanted our pictures to be taken. While heading back to my family, in the last row of grapes mind you, he got down on one knee and asked me to make him the happiest man and marry him. ENTER WATERWORKS. Yes I cried like a baby, and then I got to go inside and share my news with my family!! Here is exactly where he proposed. Here is my family that was there that night.
4. Show us your wedding rings or an engagement photo! If not engaged/married … show us your “dream” ring.
I love butterflies, there is a long story behind it but it has to do with my boyfriend I lost when I was 22 in a motorcycle accident, and my father, so Andy knew how much it meant to me……I had no idea he would incorporate that love for butterflies into a ring one day for me.
5. Tell us why you think marriage doesn’t work out for so many? What can we do to make things last.
I’m no professional when it comes to anything never mind marriage but from watching my parents have a wonderful loving marriage and going on 6 years of being with my husband, 3 of them being married, I have a few opinions of my own. Communication is the biggest to me. I lost A LOT of communication when I lost my father, bottling everything in, fighting the urge to cry, not allowing the pain to be felt. Communicating about your feelings no matter what they maybe to your significant other is so big to me. Hey, my husband is not a mind reader. I don’t expect him to just know how I am feeling every day. Trust is also very important to us, because we have that trust we are both able to enjoy each our relationship more. We have friends outside of our marriage, we have couples we enjoy being together with, we both love our time apart as well. Yes we are crazy, but it works. Absence does make the heart grow fonder. By 5pm on a week night, I can’t wait to kiss him. By Sunday morning on a weekend away with friends or family I can not stand it any longer and could jump into his arms. Lastly,is Respect. Respecting one another and each others feelings are a necessity to me. Every woman deserves respect. I came from a family where my grandmothers were the caregivers in each and every way and they both turned out to be such strong woman whom I’ve always admired, my mother and father raised my sister and I in a home where it’s 50/50. The woman’s wants and needs are just as important as a mans. Respect is to be given to anyone so why not have it in a marriage. Thanks Becky for letting me relive my love story!! Visit Becky at From Mrs. to Mama. It’s a great read. And stay tuned, maybe next week I’ll do another Show and Tell Monday.